(Unoriginal, English translation)
One, two, three…one, two, three…on, off, off, on.
I count my sins and blessings since my birth, I feel disgusted of what I can be or feel a need to be praised for what I was, I live in a zombie culture with abbreviations like LOL, LMAO. We even started using abbreviations to disease like OCD, ALS, never treated just forgotten.
I walk avoiding cracks on the ground, as I sometimes avoid people. I would like to have courage for people as I lack courage to stop the voices in my head, but I feel so alive. I feel like everything is at my palm, I live in Paris but my family is with me every day, I carry them in my pocket.
In my pocket, I carry my dreams. I wanted to be a diver, now I see divers in 3D, 360, VR. My life is augmented, my life is free, and my life is with me, in my pocket. I listen to music in 1080p HD, and sometimes I even intentionally make it low resolution just to be closer and to feel more natural, I just
I find sex online, with three letters just three same letters XXX, how easy, one would say moronic.
But sometimes I still cry, I know my life is perfect, I have an Instagram with over 1000 people who see my photos, they like my photos, I share what I eat, what I cook. They live my life with me, I always get more than 50 likes on my photos and I work for myself online on my laptop, I don’t depend on anyone because I am like my laptop, remote, portable.
Sometimes, I sit bored and I cannot cry, I do not have things to cry about so I watch sad movies, and I cry because I live the moment that the people act, I even comment on every action they do, I feel very close to them.
After that, I follow the actors on social media to know what they thought of everything, because they use features like Facebook Live or Instagram Live, I ask them questions in the chat box, and they respond.
I feel so happy, I feel so alive.
Life was never close to me like this. I just need to find love, I guess I need to upgrade my Tinder to “Gold”, it’s just 10 euros a month.
Art by Yvana Samandova